YOUTH IN TRAUMA (YIT) HELPING OUR YOUNG PEOPLE THROUGH MENTORSHIP

 "IF YOU HAVE EXPERIENCED TRAUMA BUT HAVEN'T EXCAVATED IT, THE WOUNDED PARTS OF YOU WILL AFFECT EVERYTHING YOU'VE MANAGED TO BUILD." --What Happened To You? Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry

Mentors are: "MEN/WOMEN ENCOURAGING NECESSARY THOUGHTS OF RESPONSIBILITY and SELF DEVELOPMENT" through experience, transformation, positive thinking, patience, and consistency. Our aim is centered around creating a safe space necessary for our Youth In Trauma (YIT) to develop and to feel comfortable enough to allow us to reach the CORE (Conflict Observation & Reoccurring Experiences) of their most traumatic and painful experiences.

CORE exploring will give us the opportunity to identify the problematic issues which directly affects the YIT on multiple levels of his/her development. Such as but not limited to, their thoughts and feelings when traumatic experiences manifest in their lives? What conflict is created as a result of those reoccurrences? And what they feel is needed to overcome and get through those moments?

There issues can range from self-esteem (lack of value and confidence in self), feelings of shame, peer pressure, bullying, physical, emotional, and psychological abuse, lack of a mother's/father's influence or direction, drug addiction, violent involved situations, unwavering loyalty to street organizations, and poverty related decision making that eventually brought them to prison.

We would like to offer this program to help alleviate some of the traumatic events our YIT's have lived and is presently living through. Our objective is to have biweekly classes facilitated by seasoned mentors who have personally experienced trauma related issues. We are willing to share those experiences and triumphs with the YIT with the sincerest hope of helping them walk through their trauma so they can start to heal from it.

We also want to bring in a clinical psychologist to examine the YIT in one-on-one and group sessions to provide a textbook understanding in regards to their trauma. This duality will allow for us to cover more ground with the YIT's without missing a beat to help and assist them through the difficult reemerging traumatic moments in which they frequently encounter. These weekly sessions will offer emotional and therapeutic support to the YIT's.

Our hope is to create these interventional dialogues to gain a deeper understanding of the YIT's trauma. These intense observational and confidence building sessions will work in two ways. (1) They will work to eradicate the hidden barrier that prevents the YIT from dealing with and/or expressing their trauma; and (2) transforming their emotional pain so we can see how they respond physically to the trauma.

This is necessary for the YIT's to enjoy stability, peace, resolution, and progress. And from personal experience, when youth trauma is not addressed and dealt with, it becomes adult trauma with the propensity to repeatedly hurt and disrupt the YIT's day to day. I have witnessed adult men in prison exhibit behaviors with a direct link to childhood trauma. There trauma is displayed through anger, resentment, shame, and a stone set mentality which prevents in some cases, intervention and healing.

We need to address the YIT's instability when it comes to expressing their trauma based emotions through anger and violence. We need to have critical but nonthreatening emotional and mental exercises with the YIT. These beyond the surface exercises will consist of delving to the ROOT of their traumatic events and helping them to bring that trauma to the surface so we can figure out the best procedure to help the YIT deal/heal that particular trauma.

Through this discovery, we will have a clear understanding of what the YIT requires as it relates to their trauma. This requirement could be medication (instructed only by a professional psychologist), mental and emotional stimulation, or just talking/listening sessions. In this, we will know why their trauma leads to depression, dissociation, drug use, violence, recidivism, etc. The ROOT (Reliving Our Own Traumas) will be looked at later on in the discussion.

The men at the Macomb Correctional Facility NAACP chapter realizes the YIT's are not only in prison dealing with unbelievable trauma related hardships, but prison officials who refuses to offer real solutions or healthy and safe environments necessary to help aid their recovery.

In my professional opinion (32 years of incarceration), the MDOC officials perpetuate the YIT's pain and suffering by writing frivolous misconducts, placing them in segregation (24 hour lock down), and giving them zombie like medication designed to keep them in a perpetual state of decline.

We need to change that because the YIT's I've encountered over the course of many years in prison, desire real change to take place in their lives. They have told me that they do not self-medicate, commit acts of violence, or run with street organizations because they absolutely enjoy it, but because they are a means to an end. These means help them escape the feelings of depression and pain which they feel like they aren't strong enough to face on their own.

They have told me on numerous occasions that their trauma tortures and controls every facet of their lives, and they'll rather indulge in death defying antics than to deal with that pain. They fear rejection and ridicule from their peers so they keep their trauma hidden, but brothers such as myself are able to pull that out of them with genuine compassion.

We gain their trust by setting the right example and being a respectable person in this prison community. That matters to them! Also, they feel like we know their struggles because we show them what we have personally lived through in our own lives. Their transformation and healing of there trauma is very important to us which is why we are committed to doing everything in our power to help them.

I personally desire to help the YIT because when I look over my life, especially through my adolescent years, I feel like parts of me was shaped and molded from traumatic events. And I don't want that for them. It was a painful experience for me to deal with my trauma, but I had to do so because I was ready to change. I was tired of being dictated and led by my trauma, so I worked to destroy the remnants of it by transforming the pain into useful qualities such as understanding, healing, forgiveness, and progress.

These qualities allowed me to objectively look at my trauma so that I could find a solution through it. Reading trauma related books, talking with the MDOC psychologist, and building with men who had experienced difficulty, served that end. They helped me to realize that I needed to develop courage within my emotional self so I would have the necessary power to make the decision to change how my trauma affected the rest of my life.

It took a great number of years before those things took root inside of me, but eventually I came to understand with keen awareness that I wasn't responsible for the trauma I received as a kid; that it wasn't my shame to own and carry, and also, it was time to let it go. That understanding lifted a thousand pounds off of my emotional state and I have been walking lighter ever since.

I have been able to find healing and forgiveness because of letting go. That journey wasn't easy, but finding my way through it has enabled me to progress in a way where I not only desire enrichment and fulfillment for myself, I desire it for others. And Even that level of compassion emerged as a result of all that I've experienced on this journey.

In retrospect, I wish I had this help yesterday so I could have prevented my young self from experiencing so much devastation and pain at such an early age. My inability to understand my trauma allowed me to hurt myself and others repeatedly and I would like to have a do over! Seeing as though that is not possible, I would like to use what I have learned about trauma to prevent it from robbing our young people of the hope, self love, and inspiration it took from me so many years ago.

This program will be based on the (psychologist/mentors) willingness to see past our subjective minds and into the hearts of the YIT's so we can really motivate and help them. Our greatest challenge will be getting them to open up, but once that is done, we must be the fuel that gets them to the finished line. We must be relatable, and we must keep the stereotypes that has defined them for far to long, out of those sessions.

We must issue in a new age of addressing the YIT's so they will feel more comfortable in seeking us out as oppose to us seeking them. We must take advantage of every opportunity to help them and our sincerity must be verbally and physically displayed at every level. Meaning, our words must be sound and effective, and our actions must be uncompromising and direct. We must represent the very thing we are aspiring them to become.

Dealing with the YIT will take a great amount of consistency and dedication in order for them to feel comfortable enough to share their discomfort with us. We must have the patience, insight and desirability to stand in their storm with them for as long as it takes to bring self love, productivity, and direction into their lives.

We must be cognizant of their frustrations and difficulties when it comes to dealing with trauma they haven't been equipped to understand on their own. We cannot impose our experiences upon them in a way that says: "Listen to us because our way is the best solution seeing as though we've experienced what you are going through." No, that's counterproductive thinking! At times we cannot even be conventional with our methods, we must use a case by case evaluation system that allows for us to identify their issues, and make swift diagnostics to address them.

We must pay attention and we must be relatable. This will build confidence in the YIT because they will know that not only is his/her pain and discomfort a priority, but it can not work without him. Each YIT must be evaluated on an individual basis until they feel comfortable enough to be a part of a group setting.

We cannot under any circumstances, disregard this very important factor. The YIT must feel a strong sense of compassion from us for what they have experienced, and how that experience shaped and molded their reality. It is possible that our compassion may provide a certain level of hope as they look introspectively within themselves and be able to express to us what bothers them and how we can help.

When the YIT is comfortable enough to express their pain and discomfort, we must listen attentively, and if he/she gets stuck, ask soft questions to keep him/her talking through his/her trauma. We cannot rush the YIT, nor can we lose interest in their description of what has transpired in their lives. We must spend as much time as required to see them through.

Once the YIT is comfortable enought, then we can ask questions such as:


1. At what age did your first traumatic experience
occur?
2. Who was responsible for that trauma?
3. How has that trauma impacted your life?
4. Was your trauma/abuse a daily occurrence?
5. Do you remember what you were feeling as
you lived that trauma?
6. Did you have both parents in your life? If not,
how did that make you feel? If so, what was
lacking from your parents that prevented them
from protecting you from that trauma?
7. At this particular time, what do you feel is
wrong
with your life?
8. Are you comfortable with who you are, or are
you afraid to reveal your true identity because
you fear ridicule and rejection? Are you worried
of what people will think about you?
9. Have you ever been judged because of who you
are? If so, how did it make you feel?
10. Are you being bullied by someone? If so, how
long have you been getting bullied?
11. Are you a bully? If so, what has happened in
your life to make you feel like that kind of
behavior is okay?
12. How big is family in your life?
13. Have you always had family support when it
mattered the most?
14. Have you ever felt alone with thoughts of
sadness and depression because no one cared
enough to ask how you are feeling?
15. Have you ever considered or attempted suicide
as a result of your trauma?
16. What is the most important thing in your life?
17. Are you here because you want some help?
18. Have you ever tried talking to someone else
about the way you feel? If so, did it help? If not,
why not?
19. What are you hoping to gain from this
experience?
20. Do you use any drugs to cope with your trauma?
Are you a violent person as a result of that
trauma?
21. Has these questions been helpful to you?


These questions are not limited and can be increased upon or taken away at any given time. What's important is the trauma and it's affects on the YIT. We must work to provide real solutions and not "feel good statements" designed to sugarcoat or minimize the YIT's trauma.

We cannot be seen as just authority figures (elders) with a bunch of intelligence and very little empathy on how
they see the world. We must be imaginative and creative in dealing with the YIT so they can feel the child in us as we too struggled to find our way through our past trauma.

This shared experience will bond us with the YIT in a productive and meaningful way. By showing them how we went to the ROOT of our trauma and brought it to the surface so we could understand and then move through it, will give them the same belief as well.

THE CAPACITY TO BE CONNECTED IN MEANINGFUL AND HEALTHY WAYS IS SHAPED BY OUR EARLIEST RELATIONSHIPS. LOVE AND LOVING CARE GIVING, IS THE FOUNDATION OF OUR DEVELOPMENT. What Happened To You? Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry

ROOT
(RELIVING OUR OWN TRAUMAS)

Coming to prison thirty years ago brought to my attention the fact that I didn't know myself because I didn't know the people who gave life to me. My mother, bless her heart, loves me with all she has, but she keeps so much from me. She doesn't like speaking about the past or trauma related situations, so on some level, I feel like I don't even know who she is.

My father on the other hand is different, I never knew him and my mother never shared anything other than his name with me. And despite the numerous times I asked, she remained closed on the subject of my father. This makes me wonder what kind of trauma she experienced with him that is such a painful topic to discuss? Today, I am fifty years old and I feel like her traumatic experiences denied me a relationship with my father.

These unknowns and unanswered questions about my life hindered me early on in my development. When I was trying to learn who I was and where I came from, I was denied that information. Those hindrances produced the person that had no value for life, truth, or others. I felt like I was being denied and lied to on a regular basis, so in turn, I denied and lied to others on a regular basis!

There was no way of me knowing what I was feeling other than pain because no one ever told me what trauma was or how I was affected by it. But when I think about it in those terms, trauma destroyed so much inside of me, and left a hole that I never thought could be filled. I was full of so much anger and pain that I chased death many times as a teenager.

I was shot, stabbed, and found myself in extreme volatile situations, but death never came. I abused alcohol, marijuana, and women, but death never came. I sold drugs, robbed people, and came to prison with a 50 year sentence, but death never came. Prison made matters even worst, the cage added to my rage and I acted on it, but still, death never came.

Throughout my incarceration I probably received over 50 infractions from everything from assault to threatening behavior, but death never came. After years of chasing death, I finally asked myself, "why are you trying so hard to die?"

Because I was tired of feeling this overwhelming pain throughout my life. I was born into a world where my father didn't love me enough to stick around and my mother didn't love me enough to tell me the truth. So I hated my life, but I wanted so badly to hate them, but I couldn't do it. As a kid I was abused, and I blamed it on the absence of my father, not so much on my mother because at least she was in my life.

After the abuse occurred, I was never the same. I fought every day after that! I rebelled against my mother, the school system, and anyone I saw fit regardless of the consequences. In my mind, nobody would ever hurt me again after what I suffered through, and I was willing to die or spend the rest of my life in prison to prove that point.

I lived a great amount of my time hidden inside of my mind because I felt the safest, and I could create the kind of world that didn't exist in my physical life. "DISSOCIATION IS A COMPLEX MENTAL CAPABILITY THAT WE USE IN EVERY DAY LIFE. IT INVOLVES DISENGAGING FROM THE EXTERNAL WORLD AND FOCUSING ON OUR INNER WORLD." What Happened To You? Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry

That allowed justification for my behavior, and when I came to prison, I continued to perpetuate that same mentality for many years to come. But the last time I went to segregation (24 hour lockdown), I woke up feeling like enough was enough and that was the beginning of my surrender and ultimately my transformation.

As I started processing my trauma, I found kindness and healing from unlikely sources, and in an unlikely environment. Incarcerated men who had been in prison for years, and made the transition from one mind set (criminology), to another mind set (empathy and atonement) had shown me the kind of genuine regard that I had never known.

These brothers shared their knowledge, compassion, self motivating books and personal stories on trauma with me. After listening and gaining courage and confidence, I eventually opened up and shared my story with them. As I began reading these books, I learned that it was trauma that my mother, father and myself was wrapped in. And in that moment, I forgave myself and my parents for the things I needed that they couldn't give. I came to understand that they could only give me, what was given to them.

In my heart I believed that in order for me to reach the top of my mountain, I had to seek to understand the nature of myself at my root. I had to dig internally for the very truth I couldn't find in my physical exploration. Once I done this, I began to put myself back together, piece by piece. I let go of the shame, anger, blame, revenge, and pleas of death that I had been carrying for what seemed like forever, and I surrendered to the better parts of me.

Today, I am who I was always meant to be, a compassionate, caring, kind, intelligent and altruistic human being. I no longer claim the baggage of yesterday, because I know in this moment, that I can live and feel exactly how I desire, free! Free in mind, body, and spirit.
Reliving my trauma allowed me to understand the traumas my mother and father suffered from which allowed me to be understanding towards what they endured. Instead of being critical and judgmental like I was yesterday, I sought to empathize so I could have a better idea on what they went through, so I could fix what I was going through. My parents and I experienced trauma differently, and yet we still deserve the same kind of compassion and healing.

TRAUMA LEAVES YOU SHIPWRECKED. YOU ARE LEFT TO REBUILD YOUR INNER WORLD. PART OF THE REBUILDING, THE HEALING PROCESS, IS REVISITING THE SHATTERED HULL OF YOUR OLD WORLDVIEW; YOU SIFT THROUGH THE WRECKAGE LOOKING FOR WHAT REMAINS, SEEKING YOUR BROKEN PIECES. What Happened To You? Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry


Our YIT's deserve the same kind of compassion and healing to help them overcome their trauma, and we must be diligent in our efforts to see them through. We must equip the YIT with tools that will empower them as they go through and seek to overcome their trauma.

We will not judge or stigmatized them with the label "Troubled Youth" because in my opinion, it implies that they are the problem, when in fact and in most cases, their trauma is the result of what someone has done to them. Youth In Trauma acknowledges their issues that something terrible has happened to them and we desire to help them through traumatic experiences.

We realize that their childhood trauma has created the difficulty that imbalances them on so many levels. They are counterproductive to what is right because they do not know how to regulate themselves in order to deal with what bothers them. We must be the ones that works to save them because the alternative is more prison and more death.

We must put into place the "3 (P) System" Participation, Practice and Productivity. Each "P" being representative to links in a chain serving the interest of the whole. One cannot function independently without the other. When we get the YIT to participate in the process of uncovering and dealing with their trauma, we must teach them how to put that information into practice so they can be productive on their road to recovery.

They must see and feel our presence at every stage of their development. We must dedicate our compassion, understanding, time, energy and resources in giving them what they crave most. Understanding, consistency, respect, attention, patience and most of all, love. If we can do this, it will not be difficult teaching them this system.

PARTICIPATION -- Consist of the YIT being willing
to speak about their trauma so we can identify the
conflict, and address the pain and dissatisfaction
that arises because of it.

PRACTICE -- Consist of the YIT taking what was
discovered in the process and applying that
information into their daily routine so doing it will
become as natural as breathing.

PRODUCTIVITY -- Consist of the YIT being able to
benefit from his participation and practice by
developing the necessary skills to be productive as
the result of the first two. The YIT will gain
strength confidence, and self love through the
incorporations of this system, and it will validate
him in a way that nothing else has.

As he/she falls in love with the 'Three P' system, he/she will automatically start sharing his/her skills with his/her friends. Who in turn will desire to come to the program to deal with their trauma as well. My experiences as they relate to our youth is very personal. Personal because not only was I just like them, but in the course of my 32 years in prison, I have seen so many of our young people come through these prison doors. There presence tears my heart into pieces, and this is why I am so adamant and committed to helping them.

We have worked extremely hard to deal with our trauma so we could change how we let it affect us. In the process of that, we found out who we were and what we were meant to do with the rest of our lives. We were meant to be the kind of people that our YIT would feel comfortable talking with about some of the things they are going through. We were meant to do the kind of work that would have the greatest impact on someone else's life.

Our desire is to serve so that others may reach their fullest potential as we have, and we continue to do. Prison does not define us, nor can it limit the things we are capable of doing. Our penitence is genuine and our regards for the YIT is paramount to all else. Help us to help our young people become beautiful and bright individuals, so that they in turn may lead us productively, creatively and morally into the future.

Respectfully,


Brothers/Sisters Who Care (BSWC)